Meet Adaora Aguoji, MSMFT

Adaora Aguoji, MSMFT, is a graduate of the Family Institute at Northwestern University with a passion for working with diverse populations including varied race, ethnicity, sexuality and gender. Join us in welcoming her to LifeWorks Psychotherapy Center! LifeWorks: What drew you to LifeWorks? On a cosmic level, I am sure this is where I’m supposed to be. Though, if

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Low Libido Blues: Desire Discrepancy in Intimate Relationship

Couple holding hands

Michelle Herzog is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist based out of Chicago. She is the owner of the Center for Mindful Living, a private practice specializing in relationship and sex therapy. We are delighted to share her post on desire discrepancy and communication.  One of the most common sexual issues couples

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Polar Bear Nature

Polar bear with nose in air

This morning, just like every other morning, I was out walking. But this morning it was a frigid 5 degrees, a temperature I long for all year. I know, for some, this is absolutely crazy! But for me, nothing makes me feel more, alive, more vital,  one with nature. I absolutely love the feeling of

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Embracing the Unexpected

Mandala with symbols of people and animals

Nothing but unexpected things kept happening to me. Much might have been different if I myself had been different. But it was as it had to be; for all came about because I am as I am. . . .  I am astonished, disappointed, pleased with myself. I am distressed, depressed, rapturous. I am all these things at once,

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Winter Solstice: Knowing Yourself Through The Night

winter solstice

Happy Winter Solstice everyone! This centuries old celebration is one of the most meaningful days of the year to me. Ever since I was a small child, the inky nights of winter held a certain kind of spooky magic that enthralled me. Starting with the Fall Equinox, our literal time in light begins to decrease,

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Polyphobia: Anti-Polyamorous Prejudice and Discrimination

group overlooking sea at sunset

Eli Sheff is considered a leading expert when it comes to polyamory and stigma. Eli is the CEO and Director of Legal Services at the Sheff Consulting Group, a think-tank of experts specializing in diverse subcultures and under-served populations. The following is an article she wrote for Psychology Today about polyphobia and discrimination.  Prejudice is making judgements about

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Navigating the Relationship Journey

couple celebrating on mountain

Santiago Delboy is a colleague and friend to LifeWorks who brings insight and thoughtfulness to his work and collaboration. We are pleased to share some of his writing. This post appears in Santiago Delboy’s blog, which can be found here. Just to state the obvious, relationships are not easy. While we are “wired” to be in relationships and they

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When We Go Inside Ourselves And Stay — Finding Still Center

tree branches, snow, and winter lake

Lisa Marks is a colleague and Process Work Diplomat who spends half her year in the Pacific Northwest and half the year in the upper Midwest. Where ever she is, she is strongly aligned with the environment and natural world — both within and without. We are pleased to re-post this essay at this time of

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Children in Polyamorous Families Part 5

Drawing of family

This fifth and final blog in the series on children in polyamorous families focuses on custody. The first looked at age-dependent experiences and why the kids are in such great shape, and the second detailed some of the advantages and disadvantages in poly family life. Third in the series came poly families’ strategies for dealing

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Domestic Violence: Power and Rank Dynamics

people walking through train station

I practiced family law for 10 years, some 20 years ago now, taking on several domestic violence cases. The police would be called to a house because a man had physically beaten a woman. By the time the police got there, he had released his anger freely, privately; publicly, he presented as calm and rational. The woman, being less powerful, was less free to fight back and express her anger privately; feeling safer once the police had arrived, she was now free to express her terror, anger, and viewpoint.

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How to React After Accidentally Misgendering Someone

sketched figures facing one another

This article was originally published in 2014 through the Q Center in Portland, OR. We are delighted to share it with you. Being misgendered can create an uncomfortable, embarrassing and even unsafe situation for many trans* individuals. There’s no doubt that when working toward creating or contributing to safer, more accessible spaces and services for

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Fluidity and Growth

abstract image, blue fluid movement

My aim is to bring about a psychic state in which my patient begins to experiment with his [or her] own nature, as a state of fluidity, change or growth where nothing is eternally fixed, or hopelessly petrified.” What an interesting approach: experimenting with one’s own nature.  I think most of us would consider our

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Loving Bravely – Book Review

Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon, Ph.D.

Clients are often interested in ways that they can do their own self-awareness and relationship work outside of their weekly hour of therapy. A great way to do this is by reading books that help you explore your inner experience and the relationships in your life.

With that in mind, I am really excited to share with you all a book that I had the pleasure to help create with it’s author Dr. Alexandra Solomon. The book is Loving Bravely: 20 Lessons of Self-Discovery to Help You Get the Love You Want.

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Children in Polyamorous Families Part 3

poly family drawn by child

This is the third in a series of blogs on children in polyamorous families. The first looked at the age dependent experiences of children in polyamorous families and why they appear to be doing so well, and the second detailed the advantages and disadvantages these children identified in poly family life. Third in the series, this blog explains four strategies these kids use to deal with the disadvantages found in poly family life, including blending in, being careful who they told about their families, avoiding the issue completely, and negotiating with parents.

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How to Establish Sexual Values

Illustrated flower pot that reads, "Sexual Values"

This post was published by Sexology International, and can be found here. When it comes to sex and sexuality, everyone has an opinion. Some affix their ideas to a personal or political agenda; others use convenient generalizations to further less noble pursuits—to encourage people to buy pretty French lingerie or pricey sports cars, for example.

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Children in Polyamorous Families Part 2

child smelling flower

In the first part of this series on children in polyamorous families, I explained how these kids have age-dependent experiences and why they appear to be doing so well in general. This second blog in the series details the advantages and disadvantages that children report in my study of polyamorous families. Advantages Children and young

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Green House Experiences & Insights

Greenhouse Psychotherapy Training Program Logo

We are now accepting applications for the Green House 2019 Cohort. Launched in 2016, the Green House is LifeWorks’ postgraduate psychotherapy training program. Participants join us here in Chicago for 12 months of tuition-free learning and real-world clinical experience centered on self-development, individual supervision, and cultural competence. Wondering if the Green House is right for

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