No one is immune from bias, not even us therapists! Everyone has bias. Therapist bias takes many forms, especially with regards to clients’ sexuality, gender, erotic orientation, etc… Bias ranges from misinformed opinions about BDSM to confusing polyamory with infidelity to other subtle perceptions, beliefs and attitudes. Bias is a part of us all and […] Read more “Everyone Has Bias”
Everyone Has Bias
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Estimated: 4 minutes to read
Therapist Bias
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Estimated: 3 minutes to read
by Cindy Trawinski, Psy.D. & Rami Henrich, LCSW Bias influences all of us — even therapists. In fact, one 2011 study indicates that as many as 50% of clients identifying as polyamorous had seen therapists that they felt lacked cultural competency or were biased. Meanwhile, a 2006 study by Drs. Keely Kolmes, Wendy Stock, and […] Read more “Therapist Bias”
Meeting Difference – Our Conflict with Contact
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Estimated: 4 minutes to read
“Otherness, taken seriously, always invites transformation, calling us not only to new facts and theories and values but also to new ways of living our lives – and that is the most daunting threat of all.” Today, I came across this quote about the quintessential dilemma that difference and diversity pose, from sociologist and renowned […] Read more “Meeting Difference – Our Conflict with Contact”
Sex…How Much is Enough?
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Estimated: 4 minutes to read
So often in my practice I hear complaints about differing levels of libido in partners. One partner has more interest and desire than the other. What to do? I have to say that frequently I don’t have the answer. That is, I think to myself, “Ok, you want to have a lot of sex and you don’t. I guess […] Read more “Sex…How Much is Enough?”
Expanding the Boundaries: Polyamory & Non-traditional Family Forms
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Estimated: 2 minutes to read
Last weekend, I attended the 35th Annual Meeting of AFTA (American Family Therapy Academy), in Chicago. The conference, entitled “Coupling Today: Love, Parenting, Community,” included many excellent presentations and opportunities to learn from colleagues. I was pleased and surprised to find the topic of non-monogamy well-represented in the Saturday plenary, Monogamy & Nonmonogamy: Commitments, Variations […] Read more “Expanding the Boundaries: Polyamory & Non-traditional Family Forms”
Longing for Belonging
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Estimated: 2 minutes to read
On Saturday, March 30, the Chicago Polyamory Support Group met. Into its 4th year, the group has welcomed hundreds of people through its doors. Being an open support group, anyone can come at any time. Each month a topic is selected and each time the discussion flows — both on and off topic as the […] Read more “Longing for Belonging”
Polyamory and Marginalization
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Estimated: 2 minutes to read
What is marginalization? Have I ever been marginalized? And, how would I know if I had been? Do you often feel different from others? Like you don’t quite fit in? While some feelings of not fitting in may be related to your personal psychology, some of these feelings can come from the world around you. […] Read more “Polyamory and Marginalization”
Betrayal and Trust
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Estimated: 2 minutes to read
A topic that rears its head from time to time in many polyamorous relationships, and monogamous ones as well, is the issue of trust and betrayal. It seems that most of us have experienced betrayal at some time in our lives…could have been a parent who didn’t keep their word to do something promised, or a friend […] Read more “Betrayal and Trust”
More on Am I Polyamorous or am I Not?
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Estimated: 2 minutes to read
In the last post I started speaking about identity…something I have thought about quite a bit. I’d like to tell you a bit about myself and my struggle with my own polyamorous identity. As I mentioned previously, I have been in a polyamorous relationship for close to 30 years. Naturally, prior to finding out about […] Read more “More on Am I Polyamorous or am I Not?”
Am I Polyamorous?
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Estimated: 3 minutes to read
“Polyamory is an identification that mirrors LGBTQ identification in the sense that it is not something I can control, squash, or stop. I did not make a decision to do this. It is not something that I can stop.” That’s what Helen said when I interviewed her for a research project in 2011. For her, and many […] Read more “Am I Polyamorous?”
Polyamory — Many Loves
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Welcome! I am so happy to have the opportunity to talk with you about polyamory. It is my hope that we will be able to discuss not only ideas, but our experiences too, and maybe even some difficulties we may be facing in our lives. I would love to talk with you and explore many […] Read more “Polyamory — Many Loves”