8 Ways to Love Yourself thru the Holidays

8 Ways to Love Yourself thru the Holidays

This is your life and your holiday experience. You get to design it, enjoy savor it, and exercise the power of loving yourself, and the holidays are no different. Try out 8 embodied ways you can love and take good care yourself through the holidays: 1. Align Yourself to Your Desired State of Being What would you

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Is Your Partner Guessing?

Trees With Question Marks

Have you ever noticed that rather than communicate directly, you make your partner guess about what you want? Certain conversations can be difficult to begin. Strong emotions can keep us from getting started. Fear of conflict escalating may hold us back. Unspoken signals can confuse us and make it less safe to proceed. Not trusting

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An Interview With Elisabeth Sheff, Ph.D., CASA, CSE

Highway 1 on the pacific coast, California.

Eli Sheff is a leading expert on polyamory and has conducted groundbreaking research on polyamorous families with children. In the past, she has contributed her findings to the LifeWorks blog. This summer, Eli is traveling the country for her Practical NonMonogamy workshop tour, which is bringing her here to Chicago. On Saturday July 7, 2018,

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Relationship Reset

Girls touching noses in christmas lights

This article is a guest post from Candice Wu, LCPC. She is an intuitive coach and holistic healing facilitator who helps people through the power of love, self-forgiveness, empowerment and body wisdom.    Have you ever felt like you wanted to just reset or reboot the relationship? The Outdated Default Relationship Dynamic Recently, I noticed

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Infidelity as a Growth Opportunity

tiny sprout growing through sand, growth

Santiago Delboy is a colleague and friend to LifeWorks who brings insight and thoughtfulness to his work, writing and collaboration. We are pleased to share some of his thougths about infidelity. This post appears in Santiago’s blog, which can be found here.   This afternoon, I watched a TED talk by therapist and author Esther Perel about infidelity. I read her book Mating

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Sailing Into Therapeutic Parenting

three sailboats on calm water

This article is a guest post from parenting expert Billy Kaplan, LCSW. He is the President and Clinical Director at House Calls Counseling, which develops and promotes healthy family relationships by encouraging the emotional, behavioral and mental health of children, teenagers, adults, couples and families. This post on therapeutic parenting first appeared here. I learned to

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When Relationships Fall Apart

handshake

This article was written by Lisa Blair, M.A. and David Bedrick, J.D., who are both Certified Process Work Diplomats. It first appeared here and is reposted with permission.  Every relationship has two handshakes: one above the table and one below. The first handshake is a conscious agreement between the two people, saying “We’re going to support each

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Elemental Human Experiences — Getting in Touch

Still river and trees in nature

Feeling divorced from the world or alienated from neighbors who are all around us are common complaints. It’s nothing new. People have lamented the rush of modern life at least since the Industrial Revolution pulled them to factory work. When reliable electric lighting became pervasive we began losing our connection to the natural rhythms of

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Posted in Nature

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Queer, Poly, Kinky, Single? Alternative Valentine’s Day Ideas

rainbow heart for alternative valentine's day

Navigating Valentine’s Day can be tricky, especially if you’re single, or if your relationship falls outside the margins of heteronormative monogamy. As the 14th approaches, you might feel like you can’t escape ads selling jewelry by reinforcing the gender binary or promotions trying to push pricey dinner dates for two. But, even as you feel

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Low Libido Blues: Desire Discrepancy in Intimate Relationship

Couple holding hands

Michelle Herzog is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Certified Sex Therapist based out of Chicago. She is the owner of the Center for Mindful Living, a private practice specializing in relationship and sex therapy. We are delighted to share her post on desire discrepancy and communication.  One of the most common sexual issues couples

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Polar Bear Nature

Polar bear with nose in air

This morning, just like every other morning, I was out walking. But this morning it was a frigid 5 degrees, a temperature I long for all year. I know, for some, this is absolutely crazy! But for me, nothing makes me feel more, alive, more vital,  one with nature. I absolutely love the feeling of

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Navigating the Relationship Journey

couple celebrating on mountain

Santiago Delboy is a colleague and friend to LifeWorks who brings insight and thoughtfulness to his work and collaboration. We are pleased to share some of his writing. This post appears in Santiago Delboy’s blog, which can be found here. Just to state the obvious, relationships are not easy. While we are “wired” to be in relationships and they

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Loving Bravely – Book Review

Loving Bravely by Alexandra H. Solomon, Ph.D.

Clients are often interested in ways that they can do their own self-awareness and relationship work outside of their weekly hour of therapy. A great way to do this is by reading books that help you explore your inner experience and the relationships in your life.

With that in mind, I am really excited to share with you all a book that I had the pleasure to help create with it’s author Dr. Alexandra Solomon. The book is Loving Bravely: 20 Lessons of Self-Discovery to Help You Get the Love You Want.

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Children in Polyamorous Families Part 2

child smelling flower

In the first part of this series on children in polyamorous families, I explained how these kids have age-dependent experiences and why they appear to be doing so well in general. This second blog in the series details the advantages and disadvantages that children report in my study of polyamorous families. Advantages Children and young

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What Basson’s Sexual Response Cycle Teaches Us About Sexuality

Basson's model of sexual motivation

The following article has been adapted from “Taking a Closer Look at Basson’s Model of the Sexual Response Cycle,” Jo Flannery’s article for Sexology International. It has been edited from its original format. To read the original article, click here. There is no one reason people choose to have sex. Rather, human beings become aroused

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Anam Cara: Soul Lessons From Anxiety & Panic

man screaming while driving

There is a phrase in Gaelic, anam cara, which means “soul friend.” According to the Anam Cara Therapy Center in California, anam cara is: A teacher, companion or spiritual guide … where consciousness is dulled, distant or blind, its presence grows faint and vanishes. Therefore awareness which brings integration and healing, is one of the

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Meet Jacque Pfeifer, MAMFT

Jacque Pfeifer, MAMFT is one of four therapists to join LifeWorks this year through the Green House, our postgraduate psychotherapy training and mentoring program. What first drew you to the Green House? Initially, I was drawn to the Green House program because I am passionate about working with marginalized communities, especially the non-monogamy and LGBTQ communities. As

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Meet Meryl Morris, LCSW

Meryl Morris, LCSW is one of four therapists to join LifeWorks this year through the Green House, our postgraduate psychotherapy training and mentoring program. What first drew you to the Greenhouse? I first became aware of LifeWorks after meeting Rami Henrich and Cindy Trawinski at the 2015 Alternative Sexualities Conference. They invited me to a KPACT

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Refueling: A Guide for Self-Care

person holding frisbee with smiley face

As a therapist, I focus on self-care a lot because I think it’s a vital life skill that no one really teaches us to do for ourselves.   Self-care allows us to have emotional energy to respond thoughtfully to life’s bumps and obstacles instead of reacting without awareness. That reservoir of emotional energy gives us

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